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High anxiety: Collapse - Riverside Studios

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It’s a brave or maybe slightly provocative production to use Hammersmith Bridge on their artwork for a show called Collapse, which is about how everything collapses—poorly maintained bridges, relationships, and jobs. Nothing works. That’s probably too close to home for Hammersmith residents stuck with a magnificently listed and useless bridge on their front door. It gets even weirder when you realise the piece is staged in what looks like a meeting room with a bar. However, keeping things together in the most unlikely of circumstances is at the heart of Allison Moore's witty and engaging four-hander, which is currently having a limited engagement at Riverside Studios . The piece opens with Hannah (Emma Haines) about to get an injection from her husband (Keenan Heinzelmann). They’re struggling for a baby, and he’s struggling to get out of bed. But he managed to give her a shot of hormones before she started worrying about the rest of the day. She’s unsure she will keep her job with ...

Trends in theatre 2019 (of sorts)...

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As the year draws to a close, many writers decide to write up the best or worst things at the theatre they have seen. Since I try to avoid things I know I won’t like, I'm covering what I've noticed are the all-pervasive trends in London theatre this year... Happy New Year... Phones in theatres No theatre space is complete without people wanting to text, secretly film or browse their smartphone. Even at the Royal Opera. As the orchestra started up you could hear the hissing of "turn your phone off" throughout the stalls. I put up with a man sitting next to me who had yet to master the art of silencing his phone by listening to his low battery warning for the first few minutes of the third act. After all, opera-goers can be a tough lot  and I didn’t want trouble. Perhaps we have it all wrong. Theatres could probably win new audiences by having a noisy, phone using section of the theatres. Just like there used to be smoking areas. Just as long as the noisy audie...

On long runs and intervals: 90 minutes straight through

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When is too much of a good thing, too much? I love going out to the theatre, but there is nothing more I love than hearing that what I am seeing is ninety minutes straight through. The fun of going out, the magic of theatre, brilliant performances, terrific writing... All in an hour and a half. I was thinking about this during the week when at The Maids at Trafalgar Studios I misread the play length. I thought it was one hour fifteen but it actually was one hour fifty. "Do make sure you go to the bathroom beforehand," I thought I heard the usher say in a motherly voice. I'm sure they didn't say that but that is what I heard. The Maids is a stylish new translation where two maids plot macabre ways of killing their mistress. It is a new translation of the Jean Genet play by Benedict Andrews and playwright Andrew Upton. It was first staged by Sydney Theatre Company in 2013. In this production Uzo Aduba (from Netflix’s Orange Is the New Black) and Zawe Ashton ...

Trends in London: The hot water bottle

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So far this year has been all about hot water bottles. As temperatures plummet , if you don't have a furry friend in your bed, then the next best and hottest thing to have is a faux fur hot water bottle. John Lewis has them. Or you could skip the faux and get the real thing (hot water bottle-wise)... Oh grrr...

Technology: iPhone

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I now have an iPhone which means that I can take more photos like this and in a very obvious way. No more sneaking a photo when people aren't looking. Taking a photo with the iPhone is a very obvious act... Still the best thing about it everyone is telling me is that they can see me at a party and then go home and see themselves on the internet... Well that's web 2.0 for you. One can take a photo and upload it via Posterous , Pixelpipe or Shozu so fast that you can totally disturb your friends and unnerve acquaintances... Of course I will miss my Nokia n95 . Sure it was even slower than the iPhone and had a rubbish web browser, awful mp3 player and did odd things with your contacts, calendar and task list, but over my last 18 month contract we learned to get along... After using it for a week I think the iPhone has an average phone, average camera, but an amazing browser and is afterall an iPod mp3 player... It could be the begining of a blurred but beautiful friendship...

Office banter

Paul: You know he's very Web 2.0 Colleague: I don't even know what that means... Paul: Well... What's it matter... It sounds impressive...