I recently had a few parcels go missing from where I live. The first parcel disappeared without a trace. The second parcel's contents were removed, and the box was left alone in the lobby. It's one of the things that you have to put up with living in central London. Apart from complaining to the delivery company and filing a police report, it crossed my mind to think about what would happen if I sent myself something rather unpleasant for a future parcel thief to open up. Well, Dave Florez's new work, The Gift, is in this line of thinking, except that the lead receives an anonymous gift of a turd in the mail rather than sending it to himself. It is lovingly gift-wrapped in a cake box from a posh north London bakery. It's a fascinating and hilarious three-hander currently playing at Park Theatre. Colin (Nicholas Burns) is a little obsessive at the best of times. He doesn't let things drop quickly and is obsessed with the details behind anything and everything, from making a spreadsheet on his laptop to putting together detailed boards about potential suspects. The most bonkers thing to do seems the most natural thing to do.
And so when he receives the anonymous package in the mail, he descends down a rabbit hole of paranoia and vengeance. His sister, Lisa (Laura Haddock) and her partner, Brian (Alex Price), try to distract him with trips to his favourite Crouch End restaurant or possible clues about who sent the missive, but all to no avail.
On one level, this is a play about not very much. But on the other hand, it feels very topical for the life of a forty-something Londoner. There's the anonymity of living in a big city, the puny enjoyments of a favourite restaurant or bakery in a town where finding something decent and reasonably priced to eat is an endless challenge; all the while, time is marching on, and there are regrets about settling down or making the connection.
The cast creates a convincing set of characters trapped in a bonkers farce of their own making. The story sometimes descends into the manosphere, but Haddock's character is the sane voice in the proceedings.
The pace is fast, so you don't have too much time to think about it, but that also keeps the laughs flowing. It may be nervous laughter where some of the wry observations about life in London seem familiar. Or what would happen if some unknown person decided they didn't like you? In London, anything's possible.
Directed by Adam Meggido, The Gift is at Park Theatre until 1 March.
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Production photos by Rich Southgate
