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Belters and bohemians: Opera Locos @Sadlers_wells

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At the start of the Opera Locos performance, the announcement says that they really are singing. You could be forgiven for wondering that, given the amplification turns up the backing track and the voices so loud that you can't always tell what's real. But this is a mostly harmless and slightly eccentric blend of opera classics fused with the occasional pop classic. However, recognising the pop tunes would help if you were over a certain age. The most recent of them dates back twenty years. It's currently playing at the Peacock Theatre .  Five performers play out a variety of archetype opera characters. There's the worn-out tenor (Jesús Álvarez), the macho baritone (Enrique Sánchez-Ramos), the eccentric counter-tenor (Michaël Kone), the dreamy soprano (María Rey-Joly) and the wild mezzo-soprano (Mayca Teba). Since my singing days, I haven't recognised these types of performers. However, once, I recall a conductor saying he wanted no mezzo-sopranos singing with the s

Overheard in the bathroom department of Habitat Monday

Man: Oh take a look at that. Now you won't like that will you? Woman: Oh no... No! NO!

Overheard at the gym Monday...

Man #1: You go to Trade yesterday Man #2: Nah. Couldn't get tickets. Went to Joiners Arms instead... Man #1: You went to... Vaginas??? Man #2: No we didn't go there. Joiners not vaginas! Joiners Arms... It's in Shoreditch...

Overheard at the gym Monday

Man: You know she doesn't cook... I cook... She doesn't clean... I clean... It's like I'm living with a bloke...

Idle Sunday Bar Banter...

Grant (coughing and choking): I need burping, what is that thing they give to babies? Paul: Breast milk?

Overheard on the Victoria Line Monday evening

French woman: My country is so beeeg Woman: Yes, it is.

Overheard at Oxford Circus Bus Stop Saturday

Man: You know... It is much better getting the train... Woman: It is? Man: Yeah like... With driving you get caught in traffic... It takes ages... While the train... Woman: Oh yeah... Man: Yeah...

Overheard at the gym Monday

Man #1: So what are you doing tonight? Man #2: Ah just a general workout so I can get in shape for Sydney...

Overheard after body pump at the gym

Man #1: I haven't seen you in ages! What've you been up to? Man #2: Well this morning I cycled with my boyfriend to Borough Market...

Idle chatter at Canary Wharf bar Thursday evening

Woman (grabbing Paul's arm): Hello haven't I met you before? Paul: No I don't think so but are you having a good night? Woman: I sure am. I'm Elaine. Paul: Hi Elaine I'm Paul. And what are you up to? Woman: Well I'm like going to Brodies now... Paul: Oh Brodies that's where I'm about to head... Woman: Great I'll look out for you... And yes... Paul was lying...

Conversations

Paul: I have got a big chicken tonight... Adam: Yeah he is the one doing the hoovering...

Overheard on the Number 37 Bus Friday

Old woman: It's not right... Young woman: No it's not right... Old woman: I said to her. No... It's just not right....

Overheard at the gym Saturday...

Man #1: Oh I didn't realise that the gym closed at 7... Man #2: Yeah so what are ya going to do? Man #1: Well I need to go to the bathroom anyway so I will catch ya later... (He walks off... The sound of a door closes is heard) Noises then heard: Pfft! Phwt! Bbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbb!

Overheard at the midnight Eucharist...

Woman: Who are those men in black? Man #1: They are the priests... Man #2: No they are the vergers... Woman: Virgins? Man #2: No vergers... (to Paul) We know they ain't virgins...

Idle chatter on Elaine Paige's talent

John: Elaine Paige is all ham and cheese Paul: She's like a croque-monsieur... John: Well you got the crock part right...

Overheard at the Tower of London

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161120072792 , originally uploaded by Paul-in-London . American Boy: Mum, what's torture American Mother: That's when you hurt someone to get information from them American Boy: Oh... Is it justified? American Mother: Yes I think it is in some circumstances...

Overheard in the gym sauna Tuesday...

Man #1: It's not very hot eh? Man #2: Nah... Man #1: I'm gonna take a shower... Man #2: Yeah okay...

Idle Chatter Sunday

Paul: I got this text at 2am from this guy who had just arrived at Fire . I'd said earlier I might be there... Adam: What? Who goes out at 2am unless they are on drugs? Paul: Well you know what's good about guys on drugs? Adam: They're easy... Paul: Eeeexactly...

Overheard at the Wimbledon Theatre Friday...

Man #1: Oh you wouldn't believe my weekend last. I picked up two women. One was 35 and had a 16 year old son, the other was 25 and had a nine year old daughter... Man #2: Oh wow man, great...

Overheard at a dodgy hotdog stand on the south bank

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141020072666-revised , originally uploaded by Paul-in-London . Rough looking woman cooking sausage like things in a large amount of oil: Now careful kids the plate's hot and it might spit Adam: Eww... So might the woman cooking 'em

Overheard at the gym today

Man #1: You see, if you make sure your (golf) swing is like this, then you aren't going to have any problems... Man #2: But when I do that it hurts... Man #1: Oh...