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False alarms: Diagnosis @finborough

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Nobody likes Cassandra, and like the Trojan princess who was given the gift of being able to see the future but cursed so that nobody would believe her, the woman at the centre of this piece could see into the not-too-distant future. She can see that disaster is about to strike. But she’s dismissed as a vulnerable, crazy lady who maybe had a bit too much to drink. This is the premise of “Diagnosis,” currently playing at the Finborough Theatre , written and performed by Athena Stevens.  You enter the Finborough under surveillance. The camera is pointed at the audience, and it soon becomes clear that we are somewhere in the not-too-distant future in London. A city where surveillance already abounds so we can capture all sorts of crimes taking place (albeit not in ultra-high definition).  In the future, every police station will record interviews with an audience with “vulnerable persons” involved. This is to ensure no police misconduct occurs. A police officer (Ché Walker) is in...

The best little warehouse in England: The Night Before Christmas @SWKplay

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If you’re not into the Christmas spirit, you might be into Christmas dust. It’s the joyful powder the little elves put everywhere and it’s addictive. And distracts you from the shitty life you’re having right now... Anthony Neilson’s dark anti-festive comedy is having its first revival at the Southwark Playhouse . Nothing’s off limits in this tale set in some out of town warehouse on Christmas Eve. Gary (Douggie McMeekin) has called his mate Simon (Michael Salami) for help. He’s caught some little bloke dressed up as an Elf trying to break in (Dan Starkey). He’s tied him up with Christmas lights and not sure what to do. But as they debate calling the police, a prostitute by the name of Cherry (Unique Spencer) comes calling. She’s after some Powers Ranger figures for her son’s Christmas present. It’s payment for the blowjob she gave Gary earlier. And nobody is sure if the Elf is who he says he is, or just a junkie trying to get his next fix. That pretty much sets the tone in this short,...