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Ruthless People: Ruthless - Arches Lane Theatre

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What is it about the Madoff’s that writers can’t resist writing about? Sure, it may have been the largest Ponzi scheme to collapse (so far), but there isn’t much more to explore. Or is there? In Ruthless by writer Roger Steinmann, Ruth Madoff is imagined as a wronged, gun-toting woman anchored in the past while trying to move on with her life. It’s not entirely successful but a fascinating look at life and wig choices, It’s currently playing at the theatre now known as the Arches Lane Theatre in Battersea. Ruth Madoff, played by Emily Swain, is here wearing a wig. I thought it was an odd look until I reviewed how closely it matched the photo of her interview in  The New York Times .  Typically, it’s the sort of wig you might see worn by Ladies on a night out in central London, not someone who once had over $80m in assets. With Bernie in Jail and both her sons now dead - one by suicide and one due to cancer, she is setting a table for the men who have left her. And ordering p...

Needs a little more mascara: Madame Rubinstein @Parktheatre


Madame Rubinstein at Park Theatre should be a camp romp covering the rivalry between Helena Rubinstein, Elizabeth Arden and Revlon. But instead it is a dragged out affair that has few laughs and some  unintended ones.

The jokes are so stale you could think that John Misto wrote it in the 1950s rather than the present day.

Miriam Margolyes as Rubinstein looks the part and has fun with the role. But in the end she can't do much with a lumbering script and odd looking production. Frances Barber as Arden is terrific as her foil, but she doesn't get much to do other than look fabulous in fur.


Helena Rubinstein and Elizabeth Arden were self-made social climbers. They invented the cosmetics industry we take for granted today. They introduced the ideas of "problem skin", advertising and pseudo-science. Their rivalry, either real or imagined, should have been fertile ground for exploring women in business. But you get no sense of who they were, their successes, the products they sold or the era in which they lived in.

Jonathan Forbes as Rubinstein's assistant Patrick O'Higgins, is reduced to being a drunk Irishman who has sex in toilets. When he isn't doing either of those things he recites biographical facts of Rubinstein's life. Perhaps this is for the benefit of audience members who didn't buy a programme or check Wikipedia. Surprisingly based on the character presented here, he would later write a book about his time with her. But at least you get the chance to see his buttocks.

The other performer in the show has to be the office desk that moves across the stage more than anything else. One moment it is on the right. Then blackness and two ladies appear from backstage and have to drag it to the left. This goes on. And on. And on. There is also a reminder of the era with a projection of the year that crawls  across the back of the stage. Time goes by so slowly.

Madame Rubinstein is at Park Theatre until 27 May.

⭐︎⭐︎

Photos by Simon Annand

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