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Bit parts: Garry Starr Performs Everything @swkplay

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Garry Starr Performs Everything is a bare-bones (and bare buttocks) tribute to the theatre. Theatre may be in trouble, and audiences are down, but Garry Starr aims to save the theatre and bring back to the masses every style of theatre possible. As long as each style involves wearing a transparent white leotard or a skimpy thong. And tassels. It's part comedy, part physical comedy and part perv at Gary's physical prowess. The sentiment "if you've got it, flaunt it" applies here. So here we are with a show that has been around for some years and is having its first proper London run at the Southwark Playhouse (Borough) through Christmas. The premise is that Garry Starr (played by Damien Warren-Smith) has left the Royal Shakespeare Company over artistic differences. He is now on a mission to save the theatre from misrepresentation and worthy interpretations by doing things such as a two-minute Hamlet, recreating scenes from a Pinter play using unsuspecting audience

The day that was...

Today was Valentines Day and the only valentine I got was from an email from a creepy consultant that facilitated the office away day a few months ago. He sent it to everyone that went on the course. But that wasn't widely known until I let out a yelp upon checking my email and much discussion ensued. I was just relieved to know that the message from creepy consultant wasn't all about about me...

But the fashion for this years VD if you were single was to go out to dinner with friends. It makes sense. If you are going to blow £50 or more on a dinner you might as well spend it with somebody you don't mind hangin' around...

I had to work late so I was having none of that. But I did catch up with An later in the evening for some cheap champagne in a straight bar in Balham. Strange, but I had seen this bar before. It was back in those heady days of 2003. The fish were still there... So were loads of women. I don't think they were all lesbians. I have it on authority from an ambiguously straight male that VD night is the best time to go cruising as the women are eager for it... He must have been talking about the bars in Balham...

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